Last updated: 3/21/2025

French

Native language of Nicolas the French Engineer. Simon Mayo's mother was a French teacher, hence he knows how to correctly pronounce Molière.

Mark once attended a French exam wearing a striped jumper with a string of onions around his neck - something that was virtually recreated in a scene in Taken involving a policeman.

Over time, Wittertainment has touched on the subject of stereotypical Frenchman a number of times. Peak Frenchman would seem to be:

  • On a bicycle
  • Wearing a striped jumper
  • With a string of onions around his neck
  • Whilst smoking a Gaulouses
  • Smelling of cheese
  • Avoiding a bath
  • Retreating and collaborating
  • As Sacha Distel music plays
  • And reading existential philosophy
  • And having an affair.

An old advert for Cointreau liqueur is a good way to practice your French accent. Especially the line "ze bitter virtues of ORANGES".

Occasionally, other members of 5 Live's staff help Mark and Simon out with their French translations - not only the aforementioned Nicolas but also the voices in the head, or travel presenter Nick Duncalf, who helped solve the great Unforgiven conundrum.

    iWittr - French - Witterpedia